I'm sorry.
ZZZ
Shaker. I need you to-
WHHHHHHAAAAAA!!
Oh! It's you Clover!
...I need to use your disk drive.
Sure thing boss!
It's Doctor.
Sure thing Doctor!
Oh, hello Volt Man.
Hi, Dr. Doppler. I just wanted to check how things were going; isn't it lonely here?
...well, thanks to a recent discovery, I'm less lonely than you'd think.
What do you mean?
Look at this.
Whoah, what's that?
It appears to be a piece of Doppler Limited that was seperated from the rest of its owner. I don't know who it originally belonged to, but it seems it was seperated long ago.
Don't panic.
Wait, what do you-
AGH!! GET IT OFF GET IT-
...off?
It seems that, when Cranky Kong tried nerfing everything*, this piece of Limited was still seperate from its source, and could not protect itself from the nerf; thus, it lost its viral abilities.
But don't you hate the Limited? Why are you keeping this thing?
With it going from a virus to a simple organism, I believe this Limited has new potential.
It's recently come to my knowledge that, in my world, even a drop of Limited could re-form into an independent being†.
This nerfed Limited has the same potential, and if we can raise it among our group, it could become a person. A person who has better intentions than most of what came from the mistake that my Limited was before.
In fact, I think it just learned from you.
I mean, this seems nice, and kinda cool; it's like we're raising a kid...
...but what do we do if someone tries to take it and absorb it, or combine it with Evil Energy?
I took that into consideration.
That's why when this Limited reaches a suitable age, I'm going to protect it with HEX Adaptor technology, as I did with Shadow Digital.
Hm...sure seemed like this place would be a prime target given the whole 1950s direction, but I guess not...
Hey guys, Mighty needs me over in Blackreach Forest. If you need me, you've got me on the radar. 
Dedicated to the bitter end. A true Starman.
Hmm. Seems like he was forced to obey. After all, he imitated the feeling of fear.
And you're different?
!
You don't have a reason to fear me because I don't have a reason to fear you.
Now come on, I've got a copy of E.T. to watch.
Are humans always this insensitive?
You will break before raw, unfiltered misery. The Dark Matter will consume you and your hope.
Did someone call an exterminator?!
He called for an exorcist, Sanae.
What's the difference?!
Probably more than I can tell you...
...but that's besides the point!
*bip* (Dark Matter...no wonder the data I scanned was undefined in most places.)
I-is that...?!
Ah thought dat stuff all went an' faded out!
Well, the UKR wasn't here. We'll need to return to Dr. Doppler and tell him to update the radar.
Indeed...dis is a bigger problem den we thought.
Hey, Wario? We need to talk about your Wario-Man form.
I know, right? It should be physically impossible for anyone to exhibit a magnitude of that much awesome at once!
Er... That's not what I meant.
*suspicious glare* ...Go on.
It's great that you managed to put in enough effort to maximize the most of that form and remove the stat randomizer it used to have, but I think prolonged use is affecting you physically.
And whaddya mean by that, Waluigi?
Wario. We both know how that that Somatic guy managed to get the jump on you the first time you guys met. Before, you would've got up no problem. It seems like the underlying problem here is that the more you spend life as Wario-Man, the less amount of conditioning to the world around you your natural state experiences. To put it short, I think being so used to Wario-Man so often is starting to soften you.
Soften? WAHAHAH! Nonsense! I'm as strong as ever!
Wario, I saw you transform to open a jar of pickles. You've got to listen!
And if I don't?
Ngggggh. M-maybe y-you're r-right.
In a life or death situation, the answer would obviously be to go Wario-Man. But you have to stop abusing it. We'll start like this: Go the entire week in your base form. From then on, it'll be second nature to you.
*sigh*. Alright, fine. Who says I need to be a Wario-Man to invest in business? The Wario Museum has already been a global success!
That reminds me. Do you know anyone that might hold a past grudge against you? Or someone that'll steal your treasures without a second thought?
Past grudges, there was that Sark guy. What a load of crap he was. One Piledriver sent him down easy. Then there was that Sabata idiot who fell for the easiest trick in the book. A total chump if you ask me. Other than that...
Besides, there's enough handsome to go around in me as-is! When it comes down to it-- no one could compare to the great Wario!
...So does this mean we win?
...Where...
Maybe it's just a bluff? Where would this original even be?
It's possible he's one of the cronies that were with Goenitz... but they all left without a trace.
And the only way to get rid of all of them would be to have the real versions destroy them? Or just this one?
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