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WHAT!? OUTRAGEOUS! I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING!
...Is what I would say if anything down there was my problem. Well, besides for one...
So. "Duracell".
Oh, I wouldn't worry about him, at least not too much. Threats to destroy society as a whole are extremely common.
So this is one huge bluff, right?
Oh, no, he was definitely serious about that.
Okay, how do you guys live under these conditions?
It's honestly not as difficult as you might think. Eventually you become well-adjusted to the constant threats.
Really? That's your advice? Get used to it?
It honestly could be much worse for you. I've died, like, three times.
Yeah. I got split in half.
....This is insane.
Well, if we really do survive, this probably won't be the end of it, so expect worse.
...So, any of you planning on going to the Duracell Games?
Oh, yeah, I mean, I would, but I happen to value my life.














Gladly.

...Huh. Looks like they're gone now. And no less destroyed by the "chosen one", to add insult to injury.
...
Why do I have a bad, bad feeling that this is the calm before the storm, and that something way worse is coming??
Ah, my space fortress is finally complete! Now to just sit back, and chilla-
...
...*sigh*, just perfect.
And now there's a rampaging monster on the loose, destroying everything!
Oh, yeah. That sounds really bad, you should probably get to fixing that.
Don't you mean, "w--
Look, man, in case you haven't noticed. I don't care. Being a robot as well is not going to make me care any more for the well being of others outside of my concern.
However. You seem like the type to take action. I'll warp you back to.... well, that City is completely gone again...
...E-earth. I'll warp you somewhere back to Earth. Ciao.












Now, let's see just how durable you are.
Is that all.? Don't tell me you all you heroes are that simple to eliminate.
Trust me when I say I am no hero.
Hmm?
All though you did save me the trouble of looking for some no-good lowlife looking to cause problems.
...
...Yes. And I bet you'll find a lot more. In space.
Wh--
Now then, to go proceed to my schedule as planned.
(It really was my fault for remotely suggesting we should get involved with anything outside the interests of this city. I'll have to make up for it by working even harder to preserve the peace.)
What the hell?
(I could call the Brigade out as backup just in case... but I can't afford to reel them into what should be my responsibility. Besides, they've already done enough as of late.)
...Hmph. If there's one thing I loathe, it's the erratic shrieks of the innocent. But in this case, it is their babbling which will provide the attention that is necessary.
...Damn it. I was too late.
So, this is my new opponent, hmm? Well, our star-clad hero shan't worry. Besides...
By the time this battle is over, he won't even have realized it ever started.
F͏̡͟o̴͜r̢̛ ̧f̴͜ą̨͝ŕ ̶̷ţ̸͡o͟͞o ͏l͏̡o͢n̢͜g̡͏̶ h͏̶à̕v̢͜ę ̵̧I̸͢ ̵ş̴̛l̛u̧͘m͢͞b̕͡é̡͠r̷e͟d͠ in ҉͞th̵i̶͘s̛͢͠ ̕to̢͟w͘ń, a̴̛wa̕k̴͞e͟n͠ȩ̢d̛ ͘̕b̡y̧ ̢s̵҉ù́c̵h͏ ̀ĺ̕̕ó̧͞ųd̢͞ n̸͜o̷i̴͝s̷̶͟e̷s͟͝.̶͞ R̛ų̀͘c͘k̷u̵s̶es͠ ͟͞l͘͟e̕f̡͢t҉͟ ͏a̷ǹ̴͏d͠ ̕͝r̀͘i͘g͜͏͞h͘͡t̕,͡ ҉̛a̴͡l̵̛l ͜p͘͡r̢e̶͡v͝eņ̷̀t́͜i̡ng̸͡ ̨̧me̢ ҉̕f̶̴̧rom̕͢ ̛li͏̀v҉i̛ng̕ ͢͝th̡͠è̸ ̶͠q̷͝u̵̢i̸͞e̶̕͜t̕ ̢l̨͠i͠fé̵͝ ̷̕͠I̢͟'̧̧v͡e̷͘ ̕͜͝bè̡҉e̷ń ͡͞p͡u̶rs̨̀͟u̴in͘g͞.̛͞
Th̀͘҉i̛s̶̴͞ ̵̴͞"̀͡Ré̶͠g͏u̢҉l͠u̢s̷̢"̴҉ ̀h͠a̴ş ͠͞gi̧͝v́͢ę̶ņ̷ ̵m̧͜ȩ̴̕ ̕j̵̡͢ư̴̶s͏t̶ ̶̛̕t҉h͞ę ̡́c͡há͠n̶̢ce̡͏ t̸̶͠o̸̧͠ ͢͝c҉l͜a͏̀͠i̷̸͝m͡ ͟m̵̸҉y͠͏̷ ̛͠d̴e̴s̴̵i͘͡r̴ę̶s͡.̧́ ̶̧Àp͢҉p̸ą̸r̛ènt́̕͠ĺ̸y͞͝ ̧s͟h̵͝o҉̨u̴l̢̀d̡̨ Í̸̡ ̀h̵͜e̛lp̛͝ ͘h͝i͟m,̡͡ ̕a̷͡͏nd́ t͜h͢͡e͡ ҉̛p̨͘e͢àc̕͝e̕f̴̨u̶̢̕l͟ ̵şe̸͞ŗ͞e̶̸͘n̡i̵t̨y͟ ̢th̢a̴̵t̶̡ ̕I͟ ̸͜s̢o̢͜͏ ̡deś̸́i͝͠͞ŗ̵͝é w͢il̶̸l ͝be͏ ̸̡al̸l̶̢ m̨͝i̧͟͠n͢e̴͘ ͝t͜o̴͜͝ c͟͞l̕ài͘͟͡m̕͜.͜
Á̵ņd͘͘ ̕͢a̴͢l̵l ̛̀͟I ha͡vę҉ ̷̴̡ţo̢̕ ̵̷́d͜͢o i͟s̴ ̷e̢l̶̷̡m͞i͠͡n̡͟á͡t͢ȩ ̕t̀h̕͜͡ǫ̶ś̡e̸͘ ̕s͠ò-c͝a҉̕ll̸e͏d ̶̕̕"͟h̸e̛r̛o̧̡e͜͏̛s̸͡"͢͏̵?̕͞ ͘͟H̕͡m̶͏́ph.̴ ̧͟H̨͢e s̡̛hơ͘͠u҉l̵d̵̶ ̵́k͢n͏̨̨o͟͏w̵̡͢ ̵̴t͝h̢́͝é̛r̴̢e ̶i̡͟s ́́͜n͡͠ó̶̴ ̶̢̢ţ͞as҉̧k̀ ͞͡I̕͏ ̶can̸̡̡ ̧͞nǫ͘t̶̢̡ ͞c̀͝a͜͢rr̶͞y ̢ò͘u̸t.̸̧.̵.̶̸
..N̴o̶͡t̷ ̶̢͡w͢ḩ̵̛i͠l̷ę ̡I am͠ ͘K͞͝i͟l̴͞le̕͝r͢ ̸̵̢C̷̡r̕҉a͟s̷̶h, ̷̵́Pu͞r̕͟ś̵̶u̢e̵͢r͘͢ o̷͝f́͟͢ Pę̢͏a̸ce̕͡.
Gee, this sure has been a jolly old time. Maybe we should all hang out more often. Rent a hotel--
I used to have a hotel once.
We'll have one large pizza, by the way.
So, my heralds of darkness: What brings you to this establishment?
I've never had pizza before. Also Rock needs something to drown his sorrows in.
The last time I had pizza was before my universe was destroyed...

Get. Over it.
So. How are you enjoying life?
Honestly? I don't even know. I have no idea what my own Designation of all things is, much less my purpose.
Sucks, doesn't it--eerr I mean, sucks to be you!
If it's any consolation, I don't really remember much either.
It doesn't make me feel any better that the first two non-psychos I have met since magically re-existing are just as lost as I am.
But for what it's worth... I appreciate the thought. I haven't really been able to wrap my head around anything since... you know.
It's Friday, Friday, gotta get down on Friday...
(MY EARS, OW, OW, MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOP, MAKE IT STOP! REGULUS, ANYONE-- COME DOWN AND DESTROY EVERYTHING ALREADY! JUST MAKE IT STAUGH-HAUGHP!)
All of this work-- all for a "meh"!?
Sorry. With the awkward hair sticking out, and the lack of any emblem on the cap, it's nothing short of mediocre.
....Wow. Way to lay it on me, sis.
Wait, what if we both wore matching outfits? Wouldn't that be cool?
Maybe. But I'm not sure pink is your color.
I don't remember you having this much snark before.
Hmm. Me neither, actually.
Right...I'm gonna go to the bathroom for a minute.
But robots don't need to--
Next thing I know, after I enter the hospital there's this Star Man humming something.
What happened next?
Well, then I--
Sorry you guys, but I just couldn't stand being the exact same thing as everyone else (Plus maybe I'll find a little bit more luck in being a not Proto Man). So...
Whaddya think?
Eh.
Eh.
EH!?!?!?!?